family · Motherhood · Parenting · Poem · Rhyme

‘I’m Right’ Mummy, ‘My Way’ Mummy. A Parody.

A parenting parody based on Julia Donaldson’s brilliant children’s book Day Monkey Night Monkey. The light shone bright at the playgroup, ‘I’m Right’ Mummy sat sipping tea. She tutted and growled as ‘My Way’ Mummy scowled, And thought ‘She should do it like me!’ My Way Mummy tried not to notice, That I’m Right Mummy… Continue reading ‘I’m Right’ Mummy, ‘My Way’ Mummy. A Parody.

family · Humour · Parenting · Rhyme

The Zombie Stew, The Blood and The Biscuit Tin…

This ghastly occurrence, did (Would you believe?) Unfold on that day we call All Hallows Eve… I’d decided to knock up a mean “zombie stew”, Which has all the same stuff in as chilli! Who knew? 😉 Now a good zombie stew contains beans, so of course I cut open a tin and then crushed… Continue reading The Zombie Stew, The Blood and The Biscuit Tin…

family · Humour · Parenting · Poem · Rhyme

Halloween – It Ain’t Like It Used To Be!

As October cusps into November, We embrace quite a sinister theme, And the world becomes peppered with pumpkins, For this day that we call Halloween. Not exactly a new fascination, It’s been kind of a regular gig. But I find myself sat here reflecting… “Just when did it get quite so BIG!?” Back in my… Continue reading Halloween – It Ain’t Like It Used To Be!

family · Parenting · Poem · Rhyme

Ode to Judgy McJudgepants

Ode to Judgy McJudgepants Ms Judgy McJudgepants (Cat’s Bumface for short ) A self righteous person and critical sort. Will remark on the things that you do through the day. Whilst not giving a toot if it’s not kind to say. She will cast her aspersions, dismiss and abuse, Without walking an inch in another… Continue reading Ode to Judgy McJudgepants

Humour · Parenting · Poem · Rhyme

The Twelve Days of “Doing the After-School Run…”

On the first after-school run my offspring gave to me… A painting of “Mummy and Me.” On the second after-school run my offspring gave to me… One screwed up jacket …and a painting of “Mummy and Me.” On the third after-school run my offspring gave to me… One slung off school bag, One screwed up… Continue reading The Twelve Days of “Doing the After-School Run…”

family · Humour · Parenting · Poem · Rhyme

Dear Teacher… As Our Little Girl Starts School.

Dear Teacher… Our homework is due in at last. It’s taken 5 years but it’s somehow flown past!? We’ve worked really hard, and we think we’ve done great, If you’ll just overlook that we’re 10 mins late? There were times when we questioned the task that you’d set, But I reckon our work here’s the… Continue reading Dear Teacher… As Our Little Girl Starts School.

Humour · Parenting · Poem · Rhyme

I’d Love To Make Friends Like A Toddler…

I’d love to make friends like a toddler. I’m not short of a mum friend or two, But I’m starting to feel quite inspired By my tots and the way that they do… So, I’d rock up to playgroup as normal. Drop my jacket and puff out my chest. Scan the church-hall savanna before me,… Continue reading I’d Love To Make Friends Like A Toddler…

family · Humour · Parenting · Poem · Rhyme

The Adventures of Dudley the Dog.

Hi. I am Dudley. I’m Dudley The Dog. I’m awarded with glee to your well behaved sprog. I’ll be thrust in your face with a giddy, proud squeak, As the teacher explains about “Star of The Week”. You may find yourself torn between absolute pride, And distrust  for the guest that has thus been supplied.… Continue reading The Adventures of Dudley the Dog.