Blogging · Humour · Motherhood · Rhyme

A mummy blogger’s guilt….

*Whispers*

I have a confession.

It’s just, well, you see,

I spend too much time doing something…

for ME!!

I write, and I blog, and I do it for FUN!

But please keep it secret. Β I mean. I’m a MUM?

How can I justify spending my time,

Thinking up nonsense and making it rhyme?

It’s just that apparently when I gave birth,

I also dispensed with my sense of self worth?

Where once was career and professional respect,

There’s now just four walls, and the time to reflect.

I’m no longer challenged or monthly appraised,

There isn’t a framework – just tots to be raised.

Their young conversation’s enthralling it’s true.

“Why is it Tuesday?” and “I need a poo!”

And I worship my children, they’re truly my life!

But who the hell was I before “Mum” and “Wife”?

My old social skills slowly spiral the drain,

And I’m left with the fuzz of a baby-wiped brain.

So I take the ideas that swim round in my head,

And capture them all on my laptop instead.

And I share all my waffle with like minded mums,

Who read for 5 minutes between changing bums.

And I read theirs too, as perhaps they’re the same?

And sharing our ramblings might just keep us sane?

And yes, this does take up some time every day.

But is this acceptable?

Is it okay?

Our days are packed solid, we play and we read,

I’m there to respond to their every need.

I take them to playgroups, I don’t watch TV,

But I’m guilty of needing just something for me!

Am I neglectful each time that I write?

Or am I entitled and is it my right?

Is it just something to add to the list?

Of what makes “The Jury of Motherhood” p*ssed?

Those that observe and cast verdict aloud.

With the God-given right to dictate what’s allowed?

Like how we should breastfeed (but not in full view!)

How we should wean, train and discipline too.

Why is it parenthood’s all about blame?

At the end of the day, aren’t we all just the same?

Just doing our utmost to love and provide?

And raising our children to fill us with pride?

Why are we putting ourselves to the test?

Could we maybe accept that we’re doing our best?

And having that moment to write and to read,

Just helps us to manage and fulfills OUR need?

Is the self sacrifice really required?

Or could what we write make our children inspired?

To see what their Mums can reach out and achieve?

To witness ambition and see us believe?

The depth of our words and creativity,

And the strength that we draw from this community.

There’s a time and a place which I need to respect,

But I value the chance just to write and reflect.

And my family comes first – this was never in doubt!

But my blog is my outlet to figure things out.

We’ll treasure our days, make the most of our time,

Share many adventures – which I shall then rhyme!

I’ll capture the memories in my unique way,

And I’ll treasure the words to look back on one day.

I’ll shrug off the mum guilt and say it out loud.

I’m not going to whisper…

I blog and I’m proud!

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Linking up with:

Rhyming with Wine

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92 thoughts on “A mummy blogger’s guilt….

  1. Another great rhyme Dawn xx What will my bit of me-time involve?! 😱 I’ll have to put aside the noisy sewing machine and nail gun for a while I reckon! Xx

  2. Great poem, with lots of rhythm and I think all mums can relate to the guilt. I spent 3 hours putting together a blog post yesterday and have now cleaned my teenager’s bedroom from top to bottom to brush off the guilt! I feel like I’ve had my fingers in the penny jar!! But that’s wrong! I have a paid job, I have two kids, I cook, clean, taxi and administer my family like their private PA and I still feel guilty for indulging in a little creativity. I think that guilt can sometimes add to the feeling mothers get of loneliness – but thats where blogging helps I suppose. Keep going with your writing – you are keeping mothers connected and sane in the thought that they are not alone in the way they feel! anna xx

    1. Thank you for your honest comment Anna. I agree with you in that I devote almost every waking hour to my tots and I wouldn’t have it any other way, but taking a bit of time to blog always feels like I’m sneaking off to do something indulgent? In reality it is so good for me as I get so much support from feeling like part of a community of mums. I do have mum friends don’t get me wrong, but there is something cathartic and liberating about writing and reading other people’s experiences. Thank you for your encouragement. I’m ‘cheersing you with virtual wine. Dawn xx

  3. Because being a mum means never doing anything for yourself … Seriously, whoever came up with that piece of mummy guilt making advice needs a good talking too and a long sit on the naughty step thinking about what they’ve done.

  4. Another brill rhyme – always witty and clever. Love the topic of this one, and the bit about the parenting jury πŸ™‚ #justanotherlinky

  5. Hi Dawn, I really love your rhymes, I couldn’t manage to rhyme more than two lines, so how you do it so eloquently for a whole post leaves me impressed!

    You’ve managed to capture just what it’s like to be a Mum and a blogger. We shouldn’t have to whisper, we should be proud and I wonder how many Mums have had their sanity preserved because of their blogging? I know I have!

    xx
    Debbie recently posted…Our Climb To The Dragon Caves And BeyondMy Profile

  6. Never feel guilty: your rhymes are too good! We need hobbies and outlets to be good Mummy’s and also influence our little ones in a positive way. You can inspire them to write their own poetry one day! xx #justanotherlinky
    Sarah Howe recently posted…My Happy List Week #10My Profile

    1. Thanks Sarah. I keep trying to tell myself that. It’s got to be better than inspiring them to clean the oven (or any other number of mind numbing mum tasks that I would no doubt busy myself with otherwise haha). I agree that we do need interests outside of our little ones. They’re awesome and all that, But our brains just need that bit more sometimes! Thanks for your lovely comment xx

  7. Wonderful rhyme!
    You were able to put my daily struggle into a poem, which is absolutely beautiful. I, too, feel this sense of guilt as I look at my 1-year-old, playing on the living room floor while I sit on my laptop. But, you made such a great point! It’s so important to make sure we have definition to ourselves besides ‘mother’ and ‘wife.’ And while, yes, my family is my entire life, I too am a blogger. And proud! #justanotherlinky
    Savannah recently posted…Coconut Flour Chocolate Chip Cookies [Grain-Free, Dairy-Free]My Profile

    1. Hurrah! I’m virtually high fiving you hun and I’m so relieved to know that it’s not just me that feels like this sometimes. You should be proud. You’re a talented writer and that can only be a positive influence for your little one. Thank you for your lovely comment x

  8. Such a fab post!! I am a full time working mum so I suffer from mummy guilt all the time anyway….but it hits hard if I have to work at weekends as I then only get 1 day with him that week. Blogging helps me with understanding that we all go through it reading other amazing bloggers posts too (like this one πŸ™‚ ) #justanotherlinky
    Kirsty Edwards recently posted…Proud to be a morning personMy Profile

    1. I definitely think that we are all programmed to carry around an element of Mummy guilt! Maybe we should all just be a bit kinder to ourselves and give ourselves a break. Maybe we’re all just doing the best we can? I’m with you in that I find reading other Mum’s posts and seeing that they feel the same really helps. Thanks for your lovely comment x

  9. This is great stuff. I knew parents were expected to sideline their interests and identity but wasn’t prepared for by how much!

    1. I find myself doing the same and cramming in as much as I can while one is at nursery and the other is asleep (like now). I’ve also got an agreement with the hubby that one night a week is blog night and I lock myself away until silly o’clock if need be to catch up now that I’m hosting a linky *or two this week!* Who needs sleep anyway? Pfft? πŸ˜‰ Thanks for your comment x

  10. Amen! I feel like this sometimes – especially in the evenings too when, after a day with the kids, I just want to do something for me for an hour! My problem is I’m very forgetful so if I start a post in my head I tend to have to write it down instead of waiting :). Another fab rhyme lovely – and don’t feel guilty for reclaiming YOU! #fartglitter
    Becky (And Then There Were Two) recently posted…My Top Five Parenting Idols (on cBeebies)My Profile

    1. That’s the killer question isn’t it? The “Oh I don’t know how you find the time…?” I’m with you though. My sluttish housekeeping is the evidence that I find time where I can! (And where there is time there is generally very little ironing going on!). Thank you x

  11. Ah I missed this one originally (sorry!) but I love it! I’m currently reading my requirement of #fartglitter and passing that off as OK because Baby Lighty has had his bottle and I’m now eating my breakfast! Doesn’t stop us all from feeling just a little bit guilty though, does it?! Xxx
    Mrs Lighty recently posted…The Parenting Laws of SodMy Profile

    1. It’s like a constant niggle and no matter how much I do on an evening or when they nap, there’s still that bit of me that says “yes but if you spent those evenings and nap times doing the housework you’d have even more time to play with the tots…” I’m my own worst enemy! Definitely fine to pass off as OK whilst eating breakfast though as you are clearly multi tasking which is a skill and should be admired! Yey! Thank you lovely. I think I’ve missed your latest one too! *slaps own wrist* I’ll look forward to checking it out xx

  12. Whoop whoop – say it loud and say it proud. I bloody love a poem too! I am currently trying to teach a bunch of Year 7s and 8s all about poetry, but they hate it because we are looking at Keats, Wordsworth (dare I write it – yawn…) etc. I need to send them your way. In all honesty though, I have been questioning why I write recently. I am very inconsistent and have very little time (my one year old is hanging off my leg as I type this), but it is about having something for yourself isn’t it? And you put that point across perfectly. (Oooh look – alliteration…) #fartglittler

    1. We love a bit of alliteration! You’ll have to let me know if you’d like me to write you a rhyme for your class. (No swear words – promise!) In fact I could become “Rhyming with Cake” πŸ˜‰ Thank you for your comment – it’s good to know that I’m in great company x

    1. I love it! I didn’t even have to give birth to it either!? #bonus. Although the volume of cake that I have consumed since its birth may well be responsible for the fact that I look like I’m expecting my third? Justified indeed! Thank you x

  13. You’ve captured it perfectly – why so many of us feel like we need to blog, yet we feel guilty about it too! I love how it gives me brain something to do beyond the daily baby-caring duties, but I feel bad about spending so much time in front of my laptop/scrolling through Twitter on my phone. I just try to remind myself that blogging is ME time, and I need that for my mental health. Plus blogging is fun! #fartglitter
    Squirmy Popple recently posted…Raising a (kind of) bilingual babyMy Profile

    1. It is fun! And I agree that it helps keep my brain active too. I’m pretty sure that if I wasn’t blogging I’d still end up frittering my time away doing other nonsense anyway! (Like cleaning my oven? I mean who needs a clean oven I ask you?) πŸ˜‰ Thank you x

  14. Great poem! My kids are older and I still have “mom-brain” LOL! I’m sure that it ever goes away. My social skills have also taken a nose-dive since becoming a mother. Go figure! Thanks so much for hosting #FartGlitter

    1. Well then I’m clearly in great company! My memory is shocking now! And I have very little to offer by way of polite conversation (unless it involves poo sick or snot – which I find it rarely does for some reason?) Thanks lovely x

  15. Mummies will love this;
    I’m sure this is true
    That as well as a mummy,
    You’re still also YOU.

    Nobody watches their kids
    100% of the time.
    Occasionally they look away;
    It isn’t a bloody crime!

    Show me a parent
    Who says that they do;
    I’ll show you a liar
    Who’s full of bull *poo*

    We all need an outlet
    A means of escape
    Be it blogging, or TV,
    Wine, tea or cake!

    To ignore your talent
    Would be such a waste.
    (Apologies, this reaction
    Was written in haste)

    You shouldn’t feel guilty
    But we all do the same;
    We question our choices
    And burn with the shame

    Of not being perfect
    Of not getting it right
    Of making mistakes
    We mull over at night

    Of being judged
    By fellow mummies
    This guilt started when
    Our babes were in our tummies

    The Perfect Parent
    Doesn’t exist;
    Even Mrs Perfect
    Is regularly *drunk*!

    So you shouldn’t feel guilty;
    You should just feel proud.
    Shout, “I’m a great mommy!”
    And shout it out LOUD!

    πŸ™‚
    #fartglitter

    1. Oh my goodness!! If only I could retweet and share a comment!? I absolutely love this and thank you so much for putting such thought and effort into your rhyme! I’ve just read it to my hubby (which I rarely do as he usually just shrugs and says “Meh”) and he is so impressed too! Thank you again! I’m so touched that there may even be a bit of something in my eye… Dawn xx
      Ps. If ever you fancy writing a rhyming guest post I’d love to feature it for you! πŸ˜‰

  16. Definitely need some time for you, and it’s not just for you, it’s for everyone like me who reads your rhymes and finds enjoyment and inspiration in them – deep down I’m petrified of what’s to come but your rhymes, and the blogs of other Mums, make it real, light hearted and make me worry less about not being a ‘perfect’ Mum.

    So thanks for taking your ‘you’ time, it’s good for us all!! #FartGlitter

    1. Aw thank you so much. That’s such a lovely comment. I get so much support and encouragement from reading other mums’ and dads’ (and mum to bes’) posts. It kind of feels like we’re all in this together – and we need that! Thanks again xx

  17. I reckon if you didn’t have an outlet for your thoughts and creativity you would go insane – and that can’t be good for the kids! Definitely shouldn’t feel guilty about ‘me’ time, especially when the results are so entertaining! #fartglitter

  18. Oh I love this post, I did one that I felt guilty about not being able to blog enough but you are actually a good parent and have guilt that you may not be spending every second paying 100 percent attention to your little one. I think its healthy not to, you need that you! #Fartglitter

  19. LOVE this one! It may well be my favourite!! So clever and so true! I think you have every right to be proud of your blog, and the fact that you blog, it’s so important to do something for ourselves once in a while isn’t it? Isnt that what keeps us sane? #fartglitter
    laura dove recently posted…Happy one year Bloggiversary to me!My Profile

  20. Blogging is great – it has never entered my head to feel guilty about doing it (only when I haven’t got around to doing a post in a while) – just think of the laughs the kids will have reading back about all their nutty childhood antics?! They are our archives and we are their keepers.
    x Alice
    #fartglitter
    Alice Nipper and Tyke recently posted…A fairly normal Saturday #2My Profile

  21. Ah this is the great post I read the other day πŸ™‚ Really love it, sums it all up very nicely! I feel guilty about blogging all the time but it is good to have something that is just for me! #fartglitter
    yvonne recently posted…WEBSITE MOVE!My Profile

  22. YES! This is timely. I was just thinking the same. But with less rhyming. None, in fact. I’m pants at poems. Thanks for my thoughts in print. And for making me chuckle with your #FartGlitter.

    1. Haha I can’t take credit for #FartGlitter I’m afraid – much as I’d love to. That one is the genius of The Mama (My Kid Doesn’t Poop Rainbows), but it still makes me snigger every time I type “Thanks for linking up with #FartGlitter” πŸ˜‰

      And on that note…. Thanks for linking up with #FartGlitter! *snorts with glee like a 5 year old* xx

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