Humour · Parenting

The Ten Commandments – According to Mummy.

  1)  Thou shalt not spill. Or if thou shalt spill thou shalt make sure thou is not anywhere that there is carpet.  (Preferably in the garden.) 2) Thou shalt not steal. Not even in those shops where all the good stuff is lined up right next to the tills and at your perfect grabbing… Continue reading The Ten Commandments – According to Mummy.

family · Humour · Parenting · Rhyme

The Zombie Stew, The Blood and The Biscuit Tin…

This ghastly occurrence, did (Would you believe?) Unfold on that day we call All Hallows Eve… I’d decided to knock up a mean “zombie stew”, Which has all the same stuff in as chilli! Who knew? 😉 Now a good zombie stew contains beans, so of course I cut open a tin and then crushed… Continue reading The Zombie Stew, The Blood and The Biscuit Tin…

family · Humour · Parenting · Poem · Rhyme

Halloween – It Ain’t Like It Used To Be!

As October cusps into November, We embrace quite a sinister theme, And the world becomes peppered with pumpkins, For this day that we call Halloween. Not exactly a new fascination, It’s been kind of a regular gig. But I find myself sat here reflecting… “Just when did it get quite so BIG!?” Back in my… Continue reading Halloween – It Ain’t Like It Used To Be!

Humour · Parenting · Poem · Rhyme

The Twelve Days of “Doing the After-School Run…”

On the first after-school run my offspring gave to me… A painting of “Mummy and Me.” On the second after-school run my offspring gave to me… One screwed up jacket …and a painting of “Mummy and Me.” On the third after-school run my offspring gave to me… One slung off school bag, One screwed up… Continue reading The Twelve Days of “Doing the After-School Run…”

Humour · Parenting · Poem · Rhyme

I’d Love To Make Friends Like A Toddler…

I’d love to make friends like a toddler. I’m not short of a mum friend or two, But I’m starting to feel quite inspired By my tots and the way that they do… So, I’d rock up to playgroup as normal. Drop my jacket and puff out my chest. Scan the church-hall savanna before me,… Continue reading I’d Love To Make Friends Like A Toddler…

CHEERS! · Guest Post

How Does a Horror Writer Become a Poet? A Guest Post by Debbie of My Random Musings

It goes without saying that I’m a bit of a rhyme-lover.  I was totally thrilled when I heard that the lovely and incredibly talented Debbie of My Random Musings blog fame, has taken the leap and published a collection of her comedy poems.  I have invited her over to share a guest post and popped the… Continue reading How Does a Horror Writer Become a Poet? A Guest Post by Debbie of My Random Musings

family · Humour · Parenting · Poem · Rhyme

The Adventures of Dudley the Dog.

Hi. I am Dudley. I’m Dudley The Dog. I’m awarded with glee to your well behaved sprog. I’ll be thrust in your face with a giddy, proud squeak, As the teacher explains about “Star of The Week”. You may find yourself torn between absolute pride, And distrust  for the guest that has thus been supplied.… Continue reading The Adventures of Dudley the Dog.

family · Humour · Parenting · Poem · Rhyme

Doing Holidays With The Small Humans…

Remember your holidays just as a two? The blissful idea of nothing to do? The sleepy siestas and cocktails at noon, As you bathed in the sun to a tropical tune? The crisp hotel sheets and delicious menus, Relaxed pace of life and spectacular views? All of those things that once floated your boat… …… Continue reading Doing Holidays With The Small Humans…

family · Humour · Parenting · Rhyme

Dear Person at Ikea…

A heartfelt letter to the “Smidiot” at Ikea who designed their multi-coloured packs of plastic plates and dishes: Dear Person at Ikea. With your very clever brain. Your packs of plastic toddler plates are driving me insane. “Let’s make them like a rainbow!” You announced to everyone. “Each plate a different colour! Let’s do that!… Continue reading Dear Person at Ikea…