Mummies don’t get sick at all.
We never have a cough.
Thank goodness as we wouldn’t get a sniff of a day off.
And even if we asked them, our unsympathetic “boss”,
with all their best intentions, frankly wouldn’t give a toss.
It’s lucky that we never need to wallow in our bed,
We jump up with our “SUPERMUMMY!” costume on instead.
We never feel like road kill and we never need to sneeze,
While you run around incessantly, demanding “more juice peeese”.
It’s really quite astounding that we never catch the germs,
that you carry home from playgroup in your pocket full of worms.
We never need our eyes shut,
While CBeebies babysits.
We never have a fever and we never have the …erm flu?
We never need to rest ourselves, all wrapped up in our beds.
We’d much prefer the sofa while you bounce upon our heads.
It’s lovely when you snuggle up – and just WILL NOT LAY STILL!?
It never drives us potty as of course, we don’t get ill.
Mummies don’t watch Downton with a hint of jealousy,
While lucky sod Lord Grantham lies in bed and sips his tea.
We truly think it’s smashing when you want to be the Doc’,
And come to mend our poorly with a bandage (made of sock).
You want to be like mummy and we know you like to share,
And so it’s really touching when YOU throw up everywhere.
It’s lucky we don’t want to gag while cleaning up your sick
And even if we’re feeling grim, we sure recover quick!
The second that you need us we can “man up” in a shot!
And dash to get the calpol at the faintest sign of snot.
It truly is a blessing that we mums are never ill,
it’s spiffing how we’re fine with just
“The SUPERMUMMY Pill!!” *
(And just in case you Superdads and carers feel left out,
If you too are invincible you also get a shout!!) :0)
Active ingredients: coffee, coffee, CBeebies, cake, toast crusts, cake and child size milky way bars. (Not the kids. Obvs).
Possible side effects: Slight rocking motion whilst muttering “The Twirly Woos” theme.