I’m not what you’d class as a talented cook.
I’m hardly Nigella, but quite like her book.
And most of the time I go out of my way,
To put something nice on the table each day.
Which my baby boy scoffs like a small dinosaur,
Stuffing in fresh fruit and veggies galore.
But tea with Miss Tot can be sometimes quite tricky.
She’s what we refer to as, well, a bit *whispers* “Picky.”
Each meal is prepared and presented with care.
Cut up and cooled and displayed with “Mum flair”
But the meal shall be eyed like a plateful of muck.
Without getting sampled it’s all declared “Yuk!”
And strangely the minute it’s time to have tea,
Just happens to clash with “Miss Tot needs a wee”.
So we tried “helicopters” and made it a game,
But the plate remains full and it’s all just the same.
We’ve tried the odd garnish “Madam, if you please…
A jus de red sauce? Or a sprinkle of cheese?”
But it’s just the wrong food, for the wrong afternoon.
Or the wrong coloured dish or the wrong sort of spoon?
And heaven forbid we do something obscene,
Like try to encourage a new “something GREEN!?”
I’m not quite entirely sure how she’s alive,
Existing on none of her fresh daily five?
Surviving on toast, cheese and raisins instead.
Her only three food groups are “Beige”, “Bland”, and “Dead”.
We try not to notice and strive not to care,
As she swings upside down from the dining room chair.
So she’ll bring out the big guns and try her new trick,
To dramatically cough and announce “I be sick”.
We’ve tried using stickers, dessert as a prize,
And various portions of varying size.
But all that it seems to achieve, truth be told.
Is her dinner gets left as our dinner goes cold.
And we tried not to make it an issue of course,
As we don’t want her eating her dinner by force.
But there’s now a new word which we’ve started to say,
A simple but magical word just…
It’s FINE that she’s “full” and does not want to eat.
NO PROBLEM, she’d rather not come to her seat.
We offered her dinner, just once though, not twice,
No need to encourage or coax or entice.
And as soon as it seemed that the pressure was off,
Gone was the “poorly” and gone was the “cough”.
She tried a few stunts which were duly ignored.
At which point our little Miss promptly got bored.
And so then with nothing much better to do,
She came, and she sat, and ate tea with us too.
We watched with relief as our cheeky Miss Tot,
Quite happily sat there and snaffled the lot!
The more that we fussed and we made it a game.
The more we were giving her cause to complain?
I know I’m still learning as I go along,
And I constantly find I’ve been doing stuff wrong.
And sometimes my plans might be flawed from the start,
But I still have the greatest intentions at heart.
So maybe we each need a tiny high five,
As we seek out new ways for our offspring to thrive?
We all try to do what we can for our tots,
As they might drive us nuts but we still love them lots.
And I know as we fist pump this win for our team,
The Tots will be plotting their next little scheme…
But whatever the challenges all still to come…
Bring it on Tots, I’ll survive, I’m your mum!
This rhyme is dedicated with love and thanks to my Mum. Thanks for your help and your very wise words.
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