Dear Santa. At this time of year you’re quite a busy chap. And I’m sorry to disturb you from your almost year-long nap, It’s just that as a parent I’m afraid it seems to me, That things are somewhat lacking with your elf security. I would not dare suggest that your North Pole control is… Continue reading Dear Santa… (A Rhyme)
A parenting parody based on Julia Donaldson’s brilliant children’s book Day Monkey Night Monkey. The light shone bright at the playgroup, ‘I’m Right’ Mummy sat sipping tea. She tutted and growled as ‘My Way’ Mummy scowled, And thought ‘She should do it like me!’ My Way Mummy tried not to notice, That I’m Right Mummy… Continue reading ‘I’m Right’ Mummy, ‘My Way’ Mummy. A Parody.
Last week all of the magic of Disney came to Yorkshire. Disney on Ice brought their 2017 spectacular show “A Passport to Adventure” to Sheffield Fly DSA Arena, and we were lucky enough to be invited! Our two tots are now 3 & 5 and this was their very first taste of Disney live-action. To say… Continue reading Disney On Ice 2017 – A Passport To Adventure
1) Thou shalt not spill. Or if thou shalt spill thou shalt make sure thou is not anywhere that there is carpet. (Preferably in the garden.) 2) Thou shalt not steal. Not even in those shops where all the good stuff is lined up right next to the tills and at your perfect grabbing… Continue reading The Ten Commandments – According to Mummy.
When You Wish Upon A Star… I spent many of my pre-mummy years living in Sheffield. Every year the countdown to Christmas was officially kicked off as the city welcomed the Disney on Ice spectacular event. I’ve always been such a huge Disney fan. Even though I didn’t have littles of my own back then,… Continue reading Disney on Ice is Coming to Sheffield!
This ghastly occurrence, did (Would you believe?) Unfold on that day we call All Hallows Eve… I’d decided to knock up a mean “zombie stew”, Which has all the same stuff in as chilli! Who knew? 😉 Now a good zombie stew contains beans, so of course I cut open a tin and then crushed… Continue reading The Zombie Stew, The Blood and The Biscuit Tin…
As October cusps into November, We embrace quite a sinister theme, And the world becomes peppered with pumpkins, For this day that we call Halloween. Not exactly a new fascination, It’s been kind of a regular gig. But I find myself sat here reflecting… “Just when did it get quite so BIG!?” Back in my… Continue reading Halloween – It Ain’t Like It Used To Be!
I’m very lucky to still be in touch with a group of my gorgeous school friends. These are friendships that have seen me through the roller-coaster of my twenties and thirties, and this next 9 or so months will see each of us celebrate a very special birthday. This one is dedicated to The Girls. … Continue reading Approaching 40: A Poem
Ode to Judgy McJudgepants Ms Judgy McJudgepants (Cat’s Bumface for short ) A self righteous person and critical sort. Will remark on the things that you do through the day. Whilst not giving a toot if it’s not kind to say. She will cast her aspersions, dismiss and abuse, Without walking an inch in another… Continue reading Ode to Judgy McJudgepants
On the first after-school run my offspring gave to me… A painting of “Mummy and Me.” On the second after-school run my offspring gave to me… One screwed up jacket …and a painting of “Mummy and Me.” On the third after-school run my offspring gave to me… One slung off school bag, One screwed up… Continue reading The Twelve Days of “Doing the After-School Run…”